BeevesWe picked Halloween as an exit date and left Denton, Texas this morning for North Carolina, via Houston, New Orleans, Florida and Georgia. We figured this would be a good way to avoid the uncomfortable ritual of handing out candy to children we didn’t know.

On our way to the fantastically cozy (I mean they have thought of everything!) Lovett Inn, we noticed a bumper sticker which read:


With little else to do, we began to ponder this thought. First of all, pound for pound, you would have to eat about five humans to equal the weight of a beef steer. But, hey, let’s not let facts divert us from our desire to save cows.

The fact is, you could save a whole lot more cows by eating meat-etarians. Not only would you be replacing the beef you would have consumed, but you would forever end the consumption of beef by the people you just ate!

This reduction in demand for beef would lead to a reduction in the bovine population, which would reduce methane emissions and toxic runoff. As well as eliminating the environmental impact from the humans you ate. So, what started out as a startling concept on a bumper sticker, turned out to be a pretty good idea all the way around.

Just kidding. Happy Halloween!

By Camille Armantrout

Camille lives with her soul mate Bob in the back woods of central North Carolina where she hikes, gardens, cooks, and writes.